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Archive for October, 2008

I got a call! Not THE call, but exciting news…

Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 31, 2008

First its Halloween and there is still about a foot of snow out there. I have no desire to go and shovel the snow off the front porch and do my usual decorative stuff, but I will just as soon as I’m done typing. Our poor pumpkins and mums are frozen solid :(. We didn’t end up carving for the first year in forever. It did get up to 50 degrees today so at least the sidewalks are clear, with the occasional puddle and lots of fun oohy gooey mud to play in and we won’t freeze solid tonight.  My MIL is coming over so I really should be dusting and cleaning all the corners. I’m so over those days, instead I’ve got some good news to share!


Oooooooohhhhh SO EXCITED!!! I knew this was coming and now that its here, I almost can’t beleive it. Got a call from our adoption SW. There are several babies who will be coming available for adoption, as in turning 4 weeks and the relinquishment period will be over, their birth moms will have decided on an adoption plan for their baby and they need to find a family. She is working on finding a match for us within the next few weeks and feels that there are a few babies we would be good matches for. I’m surprisingly not nervous. She wanted us to have our profile book ready asap, “without rushing” us too much so that if we are open she can show us to the birth mother. I asked if we could wait until we had pictures from Everett’s adoption day and party and she said that would be fine to add on later but she thinks they will need the book sooner. I could very well be celebrating Everett’s adoption and then leaving to pick up our baby girl the very next day/week! WOW!!! The only hang up is that our homestudy is NOT written yet, she only wants a rough draft to begin the search. I know our worker has been busy putting the final touches on it, I am confident she will pull through for us by next week and finish writing it. There are still a few red tape things that need to be done. OUr state background check is back but still waiting on our FBI fingerprints to come back, she said anyday now and that they may already be back she just might not have them in our file yet, we were next to have them back. I didn’t realize there was a line :). It must be a figure of speech. Beginning next week we will be waiting for the call, or a call…..we’ll have to see how this all plays out. I don’t doubt there will be some baby talk in our home very soon and on this blog-promise to keep our journey updated:)!!!!


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Snow day!!!

Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 29, 2008

We had our first snow day before Halloween eeeeeeeegads!!!!!! No school today!!! I got to sleep in until 7 AM……oh how lovely. The kids are having the time of their lives in the snow, and so is our baby girl Saint (Molly)…she thinks its the bomb. Everett doesn’t call it “snow” he calls it “snow-man”. Last night we made a snowman and I drug Everett and Cady around in the sled. We had hot chocolate and cinnamon toast. This morning the older kids are at it again. Everett stayed out for a while but got cold so he’s watching a movie, I know great mom right? While I relax in my sweats and t-shirt. Oh how I love lazy days. We have a Halloween party this evening and I am in charge of playgroup Halloween on Friday but right  now the roads are closed, or they were this AM so who knows if we will go tonight and I’ll just have to do my shopping Thursday. By Friday its supposed to all be melted and gone. Perfect.

There is even more snow today and still falling. And incase you thin your eyes are deceiving you my son has grocery bags tied around his shoes. I didn’t think we would need winter boots until next month :). BTW they kept his feet cozy warm and dry. Come February we won’t be feeling so happy about snow days…I’ll try and post every time we have one and you will see why, its called CABIN FEVER.


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Adoption announcement

Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 26, 2008


I can’t post the actual announcement because it has our last name on it :(. However, its the style above only it says the following:

“We are thrilled to announce the adoption of our son Everett James ****. Born February 26 2006, placed in our arms March 2007. Adoption finalized November 2008. Proud Sisters: Mikayla and Cady. Born not of our flesh. But born in our hearts.”

 The picture is one that has meaning. Its him with his blankie and his trademark smile, and eyes. I only wish his dimples showed better, still its him. We gave him that blanket when we celebrated his 1st birthday. Cady picked out the fabric and I made it. Before he even moved home and was transitioning to our family-he loved that blanket. He has loved it ever since.

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Thank you….

Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 25, 2008

For the support, I so needed it. We are moving forward, I should hear more about our homestudy next week…? I got another email and our homestudy SW is working on it. By the end of October it should be done and our agency SW will be busy finding potential matches for us. VERY exciting!!!

Today I am getting my hair done by my SIL and my eyebrows waxed…seriously they are awful, I used to get them done every other week, its been 2 months. I can’t pluck because of my sensitive skin so I look like I have two woolly catepillars. I will feel 10 pounds lighter.


I am  working on Everett’s adoption announcements, party invites. Speaking of party we are busy getting that organized. So far we have a local clown (not the scary kind) she looks more  a doll then a clown…who will perform a magic show with her clown “daughter” then some fun face painting. We are also renting a bouncy houses, which I suspect Everett will not get out of the entire night. My MIL is being so sweet about our adoption, she hired the clown and is providing the adult finger foods, she is a foodie and can cook like nobody I know, it will be an amazing spread. All I need provide is the cake and I’ll order it along with some fresh fruits and vegies. Now to work on the decorations…which I am going to promise not to go overboard on……really I’m not!


Next week I’m in charge of our “mommy and me” playgroup Halloween party. I’m preparing for pumpkin painting, pumpkin cookie decorating, along with a costume parade w/prizes for everyone. I think thats all I’m going to do, along with healthy snacks to offset the sugar cookie overload. Should be fun. We also have our church Halloween party on Wednesday night. Making cupcakes for that and decorating a booth. Then we have Halloween!!! I LOVE Halloween!!!


Cady doesn’t like scary anything and tends to work herself up with anxiety, she is my worrier. She is more then a little bit scared of Halloween-but then she loves Halloween parties and trick-or-treat, go figure?  With the election on her mind she must have written something like this in school but this isnt’ a school assignment: “If I were presendent I would not make any taxses. I would buy lots of horses. I would go to lots of meatings and perades. I would live in the white house with my family. I would not make Halloween. Make miskydoes extinct. That’s what I would do if I were presedent!”- Cady said of Obama that she wants to vote for him because? “mom, he breaks the pattern of old white guys.” 🙂 to be 8 years old again. My MIL took her and Mikayla and my neice shopping last night. They went to Limited Too which is somewhat overpriced (in my opinion), specifically when I dont’ feel the quality is what it should be for the price.  Cady told MIL, it costs too much and its too “shiny” (her words for flashy/gaudy). My neice ended up with some clothes from the store, Cady was fine not to have anything. Then MIL took them to the GAP and purchased her and my neice matching outfits. Which I truly wish I had a picture of because they were adorable! Too cute…my Cady. She told me “Mom I didn’t want Grandma to waste her money.”   🙂 My kids are spoiled but maybe not rotten quite yet.

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Fear and hope

Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 23, 2008

So I got a call a few days ago from our adoption worker for baby Emma. From what I gather they want to make sure we understand what we are getting ourselves into. She wanted to talk with me about the situations we are open to, recommend I do some research, uh…..hello!!! I’ve read every book, every article, I’m also parenting a drug exposed mild special needs toddler. But okay, I will humor you and do some more reading. This is a special needs adoptive program-I know that. Man, I felt like she was talking to me like I was an idiot but I do tend to be overdramatic. In reality she got real. She made sure I understood what we were getting into and I “got it”.  The reality is according to experts and Doctors we could very well adopt a child that will have permanent damage that cannot be undone and no amount of love, care, or therapy will help them, am I prepared for this? So folks am I? If you asked me this about Everett, if you told me he would grow up and never be a productive member of society I would tell you to go to hell-that I know he is going to amaze everyone in his life, and that come what may he is my son, forever and always. Getting honest, this talk scared me. I am angry at myself for this fear……grrrrrrrr. Maybe I shouldn’t be??? I got off the phone very discouraged. Thinking perhaps we should back out, maybe this isnt’ for us?! Find another agency……oh man, yes doubting big time.


(The positive) she said that she is keeping in mind the birth mom’s that are due soon who match our risk level. She is going to begin working on a potential match for us just as soon as she has that homestudy in her hand, which should be any day now. She explained that they will ask us if we are willing to accept a match, we will get every bit of medical family history they have, all prenatal information they have, birth/weight/APGAR. So why is this scaring me!??? She wanted to make sure that I understood it was okay to say “no”. I told her I have no problem with that as I had said “no” to several situaitons as a foster parent. I just told her just know that if we say “No” that doesn’t mean we always will. She seemed more confident I was not so eager I would jump on the first referral w/o thinking it through. Man, she needs to get to know me. I will first overthink it to death. Dh will tell me (can I kill him for this?) “Its up to you, I trust your judgment, will support you with whatever you decide.” I sometimes wish he had more of an opinion. Then I will pray like no tomorrow. I will ask my mom, I will talk to my friends, I will talk with God some more, I will email Lorie and ask her what she thinks, I”ll talk to our Pediatrician……..then we will decide after praying some more. I want Emma. I firmly beleive with all of my heart I have felt this little girl around me wanting to come to this earth. I beleive we are alive before we come to earth, I beleive we have a right to choose how we want to come to some extent, I beleive this was her choice, I dont’ know why, but some day we will know. I beleive we are forever tied to her birth family, why? No reason, just a feeling. I don’t know this, but I sometimes think that Everett wanted to help his birth family stop the line of dysfunction through his birth mother’s side. Hard to explain…….its deep stuff that I dont’ fully “get” just feelings when I ponder and meditate. I feel Emma has similar reasons for wanting to come this way to our family. In our faith we beleive that we are sealed for all Eternity, not just in this life but in the next. I beleive that with all of my heart, that we existed before, we will exist after. I don’t know how it all works……I just know that I want Emma, the little girl I have felt and I dont’ want to say “yes” to any other baby girl, no matter how amazing and wonderful she will become. I want my daughter. I said “yes” to children who came to our family and left. But I tell you all of those children touched my life in a positive light (even if it was hard and painful) and every single one of them lead to the miracle of Everett’s adoption. I was willing to accept infants/children w/o any info. and would HAVE without question adopted them!/?? What the heck. I know the risks. I thought I was okay with this. I am feeling sick, I am feeling overwhelmed with my 3 children, with life….I know this is part of it. Okay so back to the process, if we are open to the “situation” (also known as baby) then they will present our family to the birth family along with other profiles in their “pool”. Birth mom/dad/family gets to choose the family they want. They want to prepare people for the worse case scenerio-I know this. I appreciate this. I think this is fair, honest, and ethical. Unlike the CPS workers who would intentionally withhold negative information, it is best to know everything in order to help our baby.


Man I so don’t want anyone who is in our day to day life, including family to know about what I’m writing. I’m considering making this blog private. I am not a “private” person and generally open. But there are a few somewhat negative energies who would not respect our adopted children’s history, they would talk about it to people and shed a negative light on it. I also do not ever want anyone to have low expectations of my children based on what their birth parents chose to do during their pregnancy. I don’t mind at all telling people that Everett has a sensory integration disorder, thats fine. But his family history is his own, NOT to be shared with anyone unless they need to know for medical purposes. When he is old enough we will share what we know, in a positive and healthy way, and then its up to him if he wants to share it with others.


This is where I have to admit something. The way this SW was talking to me got me scared. Not just a little frightened, but almost like whoa……hold on here, can we do this!? She told me specifically that any birth mother who uses cocaine will be drinking alcohol to come down from their highs, at the very least, and may very well be binge drinking and not admit it, that we should be preapred for FAS and FAE with any child we adopt who is drug exposed. UGH! I am not scared of the affects of drugs, I have sort of figured that those are things we can deal with. I terrified of fetal alcohol affects and fetal alcohol syndrome. I took a 3 hour class on this and it was not  Researched it extensively something I feel totally unprepared prepared as a human being to do. I dont’ feel strong enough or cut out for it. I also in a selfish mother way want the highest hopes for my kiddoes.

Everett’s mom admits to some fairly embarrasing things. I have read through the history and she said over and over again to Dr’s, WIC and SW’s, that she did not drink. I am fairly certain she would have admitted to it as she fessed up to a boat load of other totatlly unacceptable risky behaviours while pregnant with him all as socially unaccpetable as drinking.  I explain this to the social worker who then tells me that she doesn’t beleive that Everett’s birth mom did not use alcohol and that I need to expect he was exposed in utero to it. BLAH, treated me like an imbasal for thinking otherwise…….or that is how I felt anyway. But my gut tells me she didnt’ drink, that was not her drug of choice. DEEP BREATH At the same time I trust this woman, I appreciate her frankness, her honesty. I understand why she is saying what she is saying to me. She has no reason to “lie” to me. If what she is saying is true we are taking about a 50% chance that our child will have “permanent brain damage” from prenatal exposure to crack cocaine/heroine/alcohol/cigarettes and most likely a combination of several. That a birth mom is likely to lie about how much and if she says “a little” we have to be prepared that she could have been binge drinking entire pregnancy.


Today I watched Oprah, I was sick and Everett was sleeping, kids at school. I never get to watch her-it was on a Canadian channel much earlier in the day, I’m not sure if this was a rerun or not. It was amazing. Dr Oz was on and this woman who had a massive stroke that left her like an infant. I didn’t get to see the entire show. She is a brain Dr.-was at the time she had her stroke-a facinating perspective. It took years but she has fully recovered and has wrote an amazing book on her journey. Part of her healing was her mother treating her as if she were an infant. Part of it was what she said was the “postive energy” people came into the room with. She could sense that above anything else. She could feel a lie, rather then hear the words…I hope I am describing this well. I Can’t remember the name of her book. Anyway they talked about how people have always felt that you can’t heal a damaged brain, however, they are finding that is not the case. There are ways to heal-but you have to reach in and find the person in order to heal them. I am going to go out and buy the book. They brought some brains that showed the affects of strokes, I know this is most likely different then the affects of drugs/alcohol…but all the same it was facinating. I swear I could smeel the fermaldahide through my comptuer screen looking at those brains…gross, still, facinating. The thought came to me as they talked about how remarkable the brain is, You know Lori, you can heal this child, you will know how. YOu aren’t the only one who wants her healed, God and his angels also have a vested interest in her life.  I felt not going to be easy, but it can be done. Then today all day long I thought of Emma. She is going to be okay. I thought of Everett. He’s so smart, he’s so cute, he’s so perfect JUST as he is-special needs and all. This baby girl is going to grow, she is going to heal, Emma will be okay. My fear is still there, DEEP BREATH, but I have a faith and hope that she will heal. I then packed all of her little things for when we go to pick her up in the city. I got her diaper bag ready, I have a few tiny snuggly outfits, I have her winter bunting, I have her blankets, I have my baby sling, I’m ready-faith keeping me steady.


For the people who read my blog, thank you! YOu are all awesome, all 3 or 4 of you :). Please send positive thoughts our way.

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Friday November 14th at 9:00 A.M.

Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 20, 2008

Just got off of the phone with the county social worker and ITS OFFICIAL!!!! We were selected for a special ceremony in a different city so we will finalize in the morning instead of the afternoon and will be in the local news and newspapers…oh man so wish I could loose 40 lbs in 4 weeks :).

I got off the phone with the social worker put my face in my hands and sobbed. It hit me all at once. I knew it was coming that we woudl adopt Everett. Even when things looked bad, the moment I met him I knew but you know its been a long almost 2 years….with ups and downs and some hard painful goodbyes. I am so grateful today for this gift and amazing blessing of having Everett in our family. Oh I love that little boy.

Guess what he is doing right now!? Instead of dressing up like my girls did Everett likes to wear a tie like “daddy”, dh only wears a tie on Sunday, but he noticed apparently. This started last week and he is obsessed. He needs a tie every single day. He will cry and pout if he can’t find it. He has a clip on tie that is starting to look pretty dingy and ratty that he must wear with everything inculding p.j’s. He also likes my mother of pearl purse that was given to me by some special friends in the Caribbean and I have on a shelf. He puts it on his arm and says “time to go, goodbye!” then he laughs because he is just too clever. Oh he’s cute. I was trying on shoes last week and he had to try some on as well. I love this age!

He is doing amazingly well. If you would have asked me week 2 if this therapy was doing anything for him I would have been somewhat sceptical. Now, its as if his entire self has changed, not his personality because under all those behaviours was this adorable little boy. He has a charistmatic personality, always did. The way he deals with being ovestimulated, listening, thinking through things-as in he will no longer try to kill himself in his death defying stunts at the park-he will no longer run away from me towards a street full of cars or try to leave me in a store. He is no longer hitting me in the face when he does not get his way. He is not being oppositional, he is not throwing his toys/objects at peoples faces with his remarkable aim. He is age appropriate in his tantruming. Its absolutly amazing. He’s in love with his therapist and asks for her whenever we get in the car :). Its very cute, he calls her “missy” because I say Miss Cicely and he can’t say that. One more interesting tidbit. His speech has improved by leaps and bounds. He did not qualify for speech therapy, but I truly felt he should have. He had words, we read together and worked hard on those words, but he wasn’t really talking to me. He is now communicating in sentances. Telling stories, making jokes. His cognitive understanding has grown in just weeks to that of a 3 year old from that of an 18 month old. They were worried he may have had an auditory processing disorder, not anymore. I can understand him-he can understand me. It wasn’t like this just a few short weeks ago. I feel strongly this is part of why he was hitting and throwing, sheer frustration. I knew the intelligence was there, he is as smart as can be. His OT said that this is typical of children who have unmet sensory needs, to begin talking up a storm once their sensory needs are met. THey are in fight or flight mode before and its hard for them to concentrate and pick up the speech like they should. OH and he should outgrow this by age 5 with proper therapy.

Today is swim therapy!!

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Homestudy on its way! :)

Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 17, 2008

YEA! So I’ve been letting go of trying to control Emmas adoption journey like I did with Everetts. The truth is this is totally out of my hands and I have no control so why worry about it when there is nothing I can do about it? I try to get things moving or think frustrated thoughts that nothing is happening and its moving slow as molassas. But I am helpless to actually do anything about it. My mom is the one who really drove this home with me. A few weeks ago it looked as if we would not be finalizing Everett’s adoption for several more months. It should have worked out that way-we shouldn’t have been given the gift of our early finalization. After dumping my frustrations on my mom for only the 100th time she told me that there was nothing I could do and I needed to pray. Got off of the phone with mom, said a powerful prayer with Everett and that was the day that I FINALLY got a callf rom our SW and everything fell into place-exactly how I asked for it to :).   My entire life I have found power in prayer. I don’t normally talk about it because it is very personal. I do feel God talking to me at times, usually in whispers and often through other people.

So last night instead of watching ER, and after watching the office (the absolute FUNNIEST office opening EVER!!!), I decided to pray. I prayed that our homestudy SW would find the time to complete our homestudy, that the agency would be able to get things squared on their end with our background/criminal history check, and that by the end of October we could be ready to find our baby Emma. This morning before my girls left for school I stopped them as they were running out the door to meet the bus and we said a prayer. I asked for the same things. Just got back from play group and guess what!??? She emailed me to let me know she is almost done with our homestudy. She has been working with the social worker at the agency to make sure it contains all that they need :)!!! I am thrilled. I truly beleive in the power of prayer. I try to make sure but I keep forgetting to turn it over to a higher power and let go. Letting go, letting go.

I have waited 2 weeks to hear from our homestudy SW, its been a long and hard 2 weeks for me, when it comes to this stuff I may be one of the most impatient people in the world. Initially she hesitated to do a homestudy update for us but after talking with us she undesrtood and liked what we wanted to do as a family and said she would make time for us. We knew that it would take more time for her to complete our homestudy right from the get go-she was very clear about that. She is the ONLY private homestudy worker in our local area, we would have spent a fortune with anyone else and I appreciate her willingness to go out of her way to do this for us. In addition to that she ‘gets’ our family and I really like her as a human being which doesn’t always happen with a social worker.  She is not being unprofessional, want to make that clear. But still it was frustrating and I’ve been worried.

Some pictures of Mikayla-because she’s adorble! On her 12th birthday-her fave milk duds and signiture “stars”purse, fireworks at Grandma and Grandpas, horse riding-cowgirl style, and girls camp. Yes she can hold that pose for awhile-thank you gymnastics!

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Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 16, 2008

I feel like I have been waiting for years now. What will it be like not to be waiting? Waiting for my son to come home, waiting for his TPR, waiting for his adoption to be final, waiting for our 2nd homestudy to be complete (haven’t hear a word from homestudy SW and have left 2 messages…), waiting for our baby girl to come home, waiting for her adoption to be final? Waiting is exciting in its own way but I’m ready to say goodbye for good to this kind of waiting. I have enjoyed the ride, even its downs have taught me important life lessons. I would never want to give up a single moment with the children I loved on our journey.

Oh, I LOST the stroller in the last 10 seconds of bidding. I am not cut out for E-bay. James says I am not allowed to bid on any more strollers and I would be in big trouble if I did :).  I noticed he was looking online at a new phil and teds so I’m backing off. I won’t need it even if Emma comes until spring, I’ll wear her and wont’ be exercising outside in the NY winter, wish I could, its just too nasty out for little ones even all bundled up.

Yesterday during horse lessons Everett dumped a handful of barn dirt into my purse right after trying to make the obessive complusive Jack Russell Terrier brown with dirt and only the 3rd time mommy told him not to, we got to a 3. This dog is a hoot to play with…and seemed to enjoy the dirt…however, grrrrr mom was not happy. He thought it was really funny. I do my best, really I do, not to laugh-but it is hard he totally does not mean these things in a mean spirited way most of the time,  he did get a 2 minute time out for not listening but I had to hide my snickers. This is barn dirt i.e. horses have pooped and peed on it and he should not be putting his hands in it for any reasons let alone putting it in my purse and on the little doggie. I dumped everything out of my purse and cleaned each item with wipies but forgot to put my checkbook back in. They called last night to tell me they were holding it for me at the barn-hadn’t even noticed it was gone, thank goodness for honest people.

Dh, Everett, and I went for a relaxing afternoon drive through the rolling hills to the stable this afternoon to get my check book. The fall colors are at their peak right now, it won’t last long-oh how I wish it would. Its been dreary today out, the drive was amazing-made my day. One of the trainers at the stable is a client of dh’s and wanted to say “hi” dh was such a stinker wouldn’t go in and meet the trainer-he is exhausted, poor man. Everywhere we go he gets to talk vet care with somebody who adores him, happy he is loved, but its hard in its own way because he never gets away from it.

After that we went to babies R us to try out gliding rocking chairs and decided we didn’t like any of them. James is 6’7″, I am 5’3″, its hard for us to find something that works for both of us. I was sort of frustrated and ready to get the one that we sorta liked, then James said not to order a chair just yet. Oh give me a Phil and Ted and glider over a designer purse any day sweetie pie! :). On the way out we noticed that they had a stack of the new E*lmo dolls. We each bought one (one person limit). We then went to Target to see their chairs, also didnt’ like and bought a 3rd E*lmo doll there. Planning to seel the 2 extras around Christmas on ebay-doesn’t that sound like fun!? They better be worth it…

Speaking of E*lmo, Everett LUVS him. I took him to the costume store and that is what he picked out for Halloween this year, not my pick for costumes, but he’s 2 1/2 and he has a mind of his own :). I tried to talk him into an adorable pirate costume, no

go-not even for the sword-he wanted to be E*lmo. Mikayla and Cady say it looks like E*lmo is eating Everett’s head. He was so adorable last year but totally freaked out by everyon’e costumes and Halloween in general. I didn’t get a smiling photo, he looks terrified in all of them and he was. Cady was Dorothy and Everett was the lion. Too cute. He did enjoy the Halloween school parade, took Cady’s hand and walked around like he belonged in 2nd grade with Cady. Here’s last year fall pictures, I feel bad because most of my pictures of Mikalya she is holding Maya. When I figure out how to put the freaky blurry face on sweet adorable Maya. I also wish I could figure out how to rotate these pictures! sorry for having to tilt your head to see them 🙂

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Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 15, 2008

I did confirm that both the county SW and our attorney filed our paperwork and requested November 14th. I meet with our social worker next week for what may be our very last home visit with her. 🙂 My nephew clobbered Everett with a toy and gave him a huge bruise under his eye. It was unprovoked…I love my nephew he is 3 years old. I talked it over with his mom who was mortified. This is not the first time he has hit Everett in the face with a toy, he did it last week. This time he really hurt Everett. It was hard for me to not loose it.Then I have to worry about explaining the bruise to our SW. I’m ready to feel “normal”.

I just have to keep reminding myself that Everett threw things at all of my little cousines when we were visiting my parents and hurt two of them badly…I can only surmise to see what would happen if he did it, because there was no reason for it. They are to this day scared of him. And August and September his favorite thing to do when he did not get his way was to hit mom. He threw grand mal seizure fits…as I call them. Like nothing I have ever experience on a few occasions. I thought his head might explode.Therapy and sensory diet has changed his personality. He is talking, He could use words but he is truly communicating. He is thinking through things before almost killing himself trying a physical stunt. He will stay by me at the store and not run away from me. Its a miracle…it has changed my son and made him who he was meant to be.

Oh and Everett LOVES the whimsy sign I had done for his room. I didn’t think he would care he says “reads” his name soooooooo cute. He will say Everett Daddy James (last name.) Because James is dh name while reading and showing everyone his basketball name sign. If you ask him what his name is he only repeats his name and not dh’s but when he is reading it he says “daddy”.

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My Denny love

Posted by footstepsonmyheart on October 11, 2008

I asked Denny’s mom and got permission to put his pictures up before she moved back to NYC. I have almost no pictures of him doing anything. He wanted to be held 99% of the time and was fearful, stuck to me like glue. Towards the end of our time he was getting better, starting to trust and explore the world around him. I miss him…I always will. I am happy he was able to be reunited with his mom but its bittersweet and always will be.

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